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Cool One Liners

COOL ONE LINERS !!

  • Until I was 13, I thought my name was 'Shut Up.'
  • I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.
  • Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
  • The road to success is always under construction.
  • I say no to drugs -- they just don't listen!
  • Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
  • Work is fine if it doesn't take up too much of your time.
  • When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
  • Born free; Taxed to death.
  • A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.
  • The hardest part of skating is the ice.
  • The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot; the guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
  • The trouble with being punctual is that there's no one there to appreciate it.
  • If our constitution allows us free speech, why are there phone bills.
  • If you can't convince them, confuse them.
  • It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.
  • I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
  • The cigarette does the smoking - you are just the sucker.


  1. shubhi saidThu, 28 Aug 2008 08:21:36 -0000 ( Link )

    Excellent one liners to make people relax. Even I was stressed before reading but thanks, now I am feeling much better.

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  2. rkmittal saidThu, 28 Aug 2008 08:24:42 -0000 ( Link )

    thanks shubhi. that’s exactly the purpose of this forum.

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  3. acrosstheuniverse saidThu, 28 Aug 2008 14:13:12 -0000 ( Link )

    haha these are great rkmittal! My favourite is “Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce” because it’s funny and true!

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  4. rkmittal saidThu, 28 Aug 2008 16:57:32 -0000 ( Link )

    yaa, that’s too cool to disbelieve!!

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  5. felicityhappiness saidThu, 04 Dec 2008 10:38:09 -0000 ( Link )

    gr88888888 seems inadequate. wunderful , amazing work.

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  6. Firestardc saidThu, 11 Dec 2008 14:23:49 -0000 ( Link )

    Thanks for the one liners…makes ya say hmmm.

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  7. sanju09 saidSat, 27 Dec 2008 10:54:51 -0000 ( Link )

    All of those one-liners have tickled my funniest bone, and I am still enjoying “The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot; the guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.” But we should still thank the guy who invented the first wheel for leaving it lying there only, had he taken it along, the genius’s car could still not move with the three wheels invented by the genius.

    And one more “If you can’t convince them, confuse them.” This is what I exactly do to my wife, I am honest.

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  8. rahul2learn saidTue, 27 Jan 2009 14:00:44 -0000 ( Link )

    Born free; Taxed to death.

    This is really good

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